I've been feeling a little under the weather lately. Waking up with a sore throat every morning — and a constantly swollen lymph node. It's moved during the week, starting under the left hinge of my jaw. Once those white blood cell barriers proved impenetrable I think the virus moved to the right side, because that has been sore for days now. I'm sure it's just the time of year, but usually I'm pretty quick to get rid of these things... especially with all the sleep I've gotten.
Like, ten-to-twelve hours a night kind of thing. Whew. Lol.
It's like a regression of sorts; not just with those habits but in how I've returned to hobbies that I loved in a calmer time. Like as I progress as an adult outwardly, I go back to the games I loved as a teen and I embrace sides of the Internet that I was just a gangly onlooker towards a decade ago.
(That's a lie cause I could never really be described as "gangly" but like, it's such a good phrase. "Gangling onlooker." You can taste the words as you say them, you know?).
In related news... My eyes have been so tired lately. And really, I don't know why. Like, yes I'm under the weather and yes I feel overwhelmed by the daunting path laid out before me and yes I feel generally morose about the fact that I've shackled myself to a capitalistic life devoid of any real meaning but —
Well, who's to say it doesn't have real meaning. I have to make it have real meaning, right? Which is such a challenge. My life's great work, my cross, etc. etc. so on and so forth.
I think my tired eyes might be from staring at screens too much though. I really need to get back to like, less digital hobbies. Even though I'm shrinking my footprint and slowing my pace it's still all I really do. Game, write, code, watch videos, game, watch videos, code, write, watch videos, game. Not to mention, y'know, work being singularly in the digital space.
I'll go for a walk this afternoon and look out into the horizon and remind my eyes i need them to work that far, still.
Narrator: Instead of doing that, she continued to sit at her desk and discovered that Yume Nikki and a whole series of its fangames are available to play online, in browser. Her eyes began to bleed.